Yesterday, someone asked me how I was finding cycling in Toronto.

"Oh, it's great!" I gushed. "I love it. Toronto is so great on a bike."

But how are you finding the awful Toronto drivers? they wanted to know. And I was actually taken aback.

"I haven't really found them bad at all," I said. I didn't really know what he was referring to.

Well naturally I jinxed myself, and today I am enraged at Toronto drivers. Without going into ranting details that will bore anyone but me, I will say that I *screamed* at a driver for the first time in my 8-year cycling career today, and also had a terrible experience while trying to make a legal left-hand turn at a busy street. Apparently the only thing more enraging (far more, it would seem) than a car holding up traffic to turn left... is a cyclist. 

Which leads me to my next point. A reader a while back commented on my "Google Bikemaps Please" post (via email) and said:

As a long time bike commuter, the safest thing you can
do on a bike is act like a car. If the map gives you
car directions, you should follow them for the most
part.

Right now, in this moment, I'm gonna go out on a limb and say... fuck that. You know why? Because I realized tonight that I exist with a constant state of low-level fear in me, every time I ride on a busy road. Every time I hear a car coming up behind me, my nervous system reacts. It's often subtle, but it's pervasive, and it sucks. It sucks to fear for your life while you're trying to do the right thing.